EISNTFPJ

Our latest topic in MIC class is the Myers-Briggs personality types and how they affect our pastoral ministry.  After an hour, I felt like we had a pretty good grip on which individual personality traits might affect which behaviors.  In one sense, humanity and all of its intricacies in relationships seemed predictable.  That notion, however, was shattered before the end of class.  My class had done a particularly good job of falling into a major pitfall when it comes to these sorts of tests: labeling each other and pigeonholing each other into roles we were not comfortable in or had never experienced before. 

Looks like we weren’t as predictable as we thought.

It can be kind of nice and disconcerting for someone to tell you who you are.  I always find personality tests interesting because they can help me put my finger on some parts of my personality that I had a hard time understanding.  This past summer at CPE, however, my supervisor’s supervisor was sitting with the five of us and proceeded to go around the room pointing at each of us and saying, “You’re an extrovert” or “You’re an introvert.”   I wasn’t expecting his label to bother me, but when he said I was an introvert, I had a pushback.  How do you think I am an introvert? Do you not know me?

I find comfort in the fact that, no matter whether someone points at you or whatever totals you might score on a test might say, we are more.  It’s not necessarily that we are totally different (I do have an introverted side, after all, not too distant from my extroverted side) but that we are more.  We are more than a piece of paper.  We are more than a pointed finger.  How cool is that?

A Vision of Reconciliation

When a person is a candidate for ordination, like myself, one becomes pretty familiar with document called Vision and Expectations.  All ordained leaders and candidates for ordination are expected to uphold this document and the expectations laid within it.

This is an important document, one that any of us who follow it doesn't take lightly.  A pastor in the ELCA commits at ordination to live a life above reproach.  Vision and Expectations helps to inform what living beyond reproach would look like.  In seminary, we start living into those expectations now.  One expectation is to live, teach, and preach in accordance with the confessions of the church.  Another expectation is to pray for the church.  Yet another expectation is for single leaders to live a chaste life and for married and partnered couples to remain faithful for one another.  As you can imagine, upholding these expectations can provide different challenges to different people.

Another expectation is to practice reconciliation in all of my relationships, including family.  While that seems easy enough in an abstract way, I actually find this expectation the most challenging and work the hardest to uphold.  I come from an extended family that has a habit of keeping secrets to avoid conflict.  This is not always conducive for reconciliation.  There are many members of my extended family who do not speak to one another.  Family systems are not easy and changing family dynamics is even harder.  While there are many fractures in my family that have proven to be healthy fractures, I as a pastoral leader need to develop the ability to discern when the best means of reconciliation is parting ways and the times when it is better to reconnect.  I also need to learn how to part ways in a way that truly is a form of reconciliation. 

Fractures in relationships, good intentions gone awry, and family secrets are an inevitable part of our human experience, whether that family is a blood relative or the family is a church community.  Reconciliation is not always easy, and there will be times when we stumble.  But it is then we remember the expectation to stand true to our church confessions; confessions that tell us in Christ we are forgiven when we stumble in striving to live a life beyond reproach.  In that confession, I know I am reminded that I am supported and loved, strengthening me to get back up and try again. 

Wow. I'm Officially A Vicar!

Yesterday was my first day at House for All Sinners and Saints as their newest Vicar.  But, I really started on Friday where Nadia, my supervising pastor, had "Office Hours" to get to know the new vicar.  "Office Hours" are essentially when Nadia is guaranteed to be at a coffee shop during certain times and people can come and hang out and chat about whatever with whoever shows up.  I think it's a great concept and definitely fosters a sense of community.  One of the parishioners actually came and used her lunch break to hang out and talk.

Then Saturday I got to find out what I'm actually going to be doing.  And I'm pretty sure that not many other interns will have an internship like mine.  Basically, I get to be a person for an living this year!  Part of my job will be, of course, preparing sermons, having coffee from parishoners, making hot dishes for potlucks, and the like.  But, since HFASS is a mission start church, I'll get to do things like join clubs (hiking? biking? book? help me choose!) and doing volunteer work (again...suggestions welcome!) in the community as a religious leader.  That is to say, I'll do these things being clear that I am a leader in the Church.  The point is not necessarily to get more people to come to HFASS, but instead to be an active presence in the community.  My internship responsibilities also include personal health and growth, through reading stuff I want to read, working out, and making friends outside the church.

I'm pretty stoked that I get to be a person for a year, doing God's work in all the world, not just in an office!

Seriously...give me suggestions for clubs/volunteer jobs/general merriment!